Trust

What a long day, same old day.

He wasn't here, had a dinner with friend.
Talk about guy. I means "my current bf, her old bf".

Just some small talks, bad thing, good thing.

Building a relationship is just not simple as my thought.
Living together even harder to protect a "good relationship".
But, it's a process, isn't?

Lies cover the truth, truth take over the trust, trust ruin a relationship.
Make it simple, there's no more call "privacy".

I'm just a human, I bleed when I fall, I cried when I sad.
But seem, I no longer myself.

I put up with all the truth, I choose to believe those sweet stories.

Please, prove me that I have no wrong to trust you.

Quite "sometimes"

A long HI,

I leave here quite sometimes, not a day, not a month, but I realise, it's 2 years.
2 years, 365 + 365 days = 730 days. How did I survived for past 2 years.

2013, it been a tough year, happy to tell this year is going to end soon, so soon.
Few stories, one tragedy.

Tracy, an ordinary girl, fall in love with a guy, his name Joshua.


Thats' a story behind, few of my close friends tell the truth, that I'm changed.
I understand, I reaslise, but I deny. Changes is never been easy, and changes push me back.

*I always said, never love a person more than yourself, even it is, never tell the person how much you loves him/her.
*I always said, never hurt yourself, even you love him/her so much, it doesn't worth it.
*I always said, never cry so hard, even you love him/her so much, you can be such a loser in their's eyes.
*I always said, never be serious, once you serious, you no longer yourself.


People think that I'm smart; people think that I'm strong; and people think I'm confidence.
But right now, we all know, I'm no longer smart, strong and confidence.

In others word, I'm such a loser. Why? I did everything that "I always said "NEVER".

*I tell him, how much I love him, more than myself.
*I hurt myself, because of arguments, ever think of suicide.
*I cried so hard, don't even know what's the reason.
*I being that serious, until I lost myself.

In other ways, I can be so mean and cruel, walk away, when I found out you're interesting with those girls who married which you keep denying.

You blame me for no trust, unreasonable jealousy, and brainless blindy judge you based on your female friends.

I have no idea how many times we argue for this statement, but end up no solution.
I clearly understand that's only one solution, either I accept or fucked off, right?

Happy last Friday in 2013 :)